Slow self-deprecation after midnight

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Does it have to sting so bad?
When all you try is to be good enough.
How long are you gonna be 'oh so sad'?
Got yourself into the mess thinking it wasn’t tough.
 
Seems so real or is it just your mind?
Confusion covered your vision of foresight,
Stabbed yourself down even though not inclined,
Slow self-deprecation after midnight.
 
Laughing at your own sickness and breakdowns,
Cause nobody knows you on that bathroom floor,
Trying to deny it but at night you hear the sounds
Of walls crashing and everything you don’t ask for.
 
Tears keep proving they’re stronger than your kind,
Giving up wasn’t an option so you kept your smile tight,
None understand when you joke about reality,
Of the slow self-deprecation after midnight.
 
Maybe you know you’re no lost cause,
But everything keeps pushing you over the edge.
Maybe if your left alone in a quite pause,
Things might be better around the ledge,
But while your realizing that you were the cause,
It’s too late for all the glittering and fledge,
Cause its caught you living without flaws,
Now you can’t stop the self-deprecating after midnight.

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